Love has been a commitment between two people at least that is what we knew back in the days, a narrative that no longer makes sense in our generation.
Love has become a community affair either through self inclusion or through the societal unauthorized entry.
Recently, there was the Willis Raburus story, then now the late Tecra Mungai. Her soul wasn’t even given a chance to rest before people started bashing her choice of a man. What happened to as long as you are happy we don’t care who you choose?
What a judgemental society we live in!
People are no longer using social media as a space for gaining knowledge or even entertainment but a place where they can troll and bash people because that’s the only way they can feel better about their lives.
Have you looked at your partner? Would people have good things to say if you were to post them online? Or are you scared if you posted them they will be an embarrassment to you and that is why you hide under the phrase “I like keeping my relationship off the public eye’ is that really the reason?
Tecra made her choice and her happiness lied there. She was off social media when she was with him until her death. And the social media cops felt it was ok to invade her privacy. Many of us did not even know who she was but after photos circulated we already knew her, that judgemental words easily slipped off our tongues.
We are allowed to love whomever we want but society always wants to get in bed with our choices.
It doesn’t matter who you choose to spend the rest of your life with, how they look, how they behave or even how they dress should be factors that you get to choose for you and not for the society.
The Tecra story has taken me back to realize that she is not the only woman who has faced scrutiny for her choice of a man…the likes of Yvonne Okwara, Julie Gichuru and even Beyonce are among the many other women who have chosen to look beyond the physical and look deeper into their personalities and much more. Society tends to forget that a good face never pays the bills.
It is the same society that puts pressure on young women who are finding love. They want a handsome man, it doesn’t matter whether they do love them or not as long as they get their friends praising or ‘societal approval.’
In my opinion, I think women should stay true to themselves and be happy about their choices. Forget society. Stand by your man there is so much more beyond the physical look.
I hope we respect the two people’s commitment just like we do with our own.
I hope we mean it when we tell people we are happy for whom they choose.
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